November 16, 2003 - 10:54 a.m.

Where is everybody? Woke up this morning to a completely empty house, save the cats (who are not usually good conversationalists). Although this has several advantages (I am wearing only underwear, there is a lack of crappy music resonating throughout the house, I can smoke out the window instead of going outside in the New England bitter wind, I can eat Rasinets and pear halves for breakfast and nobody will laugh at me) I find I am quite lonely and am wondering where everyone went.

Yesterday I went to visit my best friend upstate. We attended a party at her neighbors house. Her neighbor only has friends that are under the age of twenty. Delightful. Topics of conversation included intelligent classics such as:

"Dude! We should really grow our own pot."

"Why the hell do they have the old guy in a wheelchair as the people greeter in Wal-Mart. That's disgusting."

"This one time, my dad bought me some beer..."

"My biology teacher is a dick."

Yeah, I've never had more fun in my life. Which is why I only stayed for an hour. I walked backed to my friend's house and watched MTV. I certainly hope I was not mentally impaired at that age.

Beyonce is looking pretty hot these days. Watched that video she did with Sean Paul. She really is gorgeous. Doesn't her mom make all her costumes and isn't her dad her manager? If that was my kid, she would be locked in a basement somewhere until her shelf life expires.

I simply will cease to exist if I cannot purchase Chanel's new glitter mascara. That is all I can think about. I have no idea when or where I should wear it, but I must have it. Might need to take a trip to Macy's later so I can drool at the counter.

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