October 01, 2003 - 7:59 p.m.

What is more bizarre than my life. Let us recap the last 5 or 6 days.

~Friday night Dan was hospitalized and diagnosed with viral meningitis. Nobody else in our House O' Fun has it. It is a big fucking mystery. Spent most of the weekend visiting him (could not spend night as he was kept prisoner in the "droplet biohazard" ward) and making fun of hospital food. The hospital calls a four inch cross section of a dirty sole from an eighteenth century war boot "meatloaf". I think not. I think the "meatloaf" should have a biohazard room of it's own.

~Sunday assisted my father with his yard sale. He is trying to liquidate his "assets" but is still mad at me for selling a broken cash register that was born the year before me for the price of $5. I cannot be forgiven. What a horrible child I am.

I have also learned that I am a fabulous negotiator. I really worked the floor with my charm and intelligence... Or maybe it was because I was so desperate to be anywhere else, people took pity on me and through $20 bills in my direction. It was pretty obvious to every stranger I met that day who was shuffling amongst the 53+ years of my father's accumulated crap that my father is the reason why I have bags under my eyes and frizzy hair.

~Monday night, the roomie and I had sex while Dan was sleeping three feet away (at home that is, not the hospital. Dan was released after the mandatory 48 hour period). It was great sex. The best. And very paranoid because I was worried about waking up Sleeping Beauty. Turns out Sleeping Beauty heard everything.

~Last night sucked. Came home from work to find the oil tank (which heats the house and water) has run out of oil. Then Rod lost his wallet somewhere in the house. With $1700 of our hard earned rent money. Until 1 am, we tore apart the entire house, with the exception of the upstairs bedrooms and Rodney insisted that he never went in them. Where did the wallet turn up this afternoon? In his underwear drawer.

As an added bonus, last night Liz presented us with a three year old boy who is the spawn of a old friend of hers. This spawn will be staying with us ALL week. This spawn is not potty trained.

~Rented Dreamcatcher last night with Dave, the newbie. We probably would have had sex too, because Dan went away to be where there is hot water, but lack of hot water for our own bodies made being extra special close a little unappealing.

~Took cold shower this morning. It was the worst morning of my life. Certainly woke me up, however. Holy shit. Might never be able to sleep again.

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