June 07, 2003 - 10:17 p.m.

Wow. Am I drunk or what? Just sent JLK out to buy more mixers. Our $9 gallon of vodka has already consumed the majority of the OJ. Note to self in sober regretful future: Never send the drunk minor to the store. I'll think about that later.

Prefer to think about last night now. OMG. Had JLK and Ken over for dinner. JLK left around 11pm, which left Ken and I quite alone on the couch. And without the aid of alcohol, I was quite horny as well. Ken asked if he could spend the night. Hell yes! I thought, "I'm gonna score".

After an hour's kissing lessons he showed some improvement. And proved to work very nicely on the neck and ear regions as well. Hmm. After some time of this, it occured to me that someone has to undress me, and as he showed no signs of doing so this year, I might as well do it myself. So I removed my shirt. And, if I must say so myself, my breasts looked (and smelled, thanks to Curve) very nicely in my pink lace bra. But he still wouldn't touch them. I don't know if it was because I was revolting or if he was just too much of a gentleman (aka: virgin, as I have partially come to assume). So I grabbed his hands and put them on the boobies. He seemed to enjoy that very much. After more time, he actually asked if he could remove my bra. He asked! Jesus Christ! I was practically raping him and he has to "ask" if he can take of my bra!

I'll spare the rest of the details regarding my own body, but must confess he proved to be quite acceptable in the lower-region kissing area. But I started to feel guilty after a while, and asked him what he wanted. Even though I knew the answer. What does every man want? Blow job. And I learned from the best and was prepared to do a very good "job" with the fourplay.

But what I discovered I was not prepared for. The penis resembles closely...a roll of quarters. The smallest penis I have ever seen...is in the pants...of the man I am dating. Of the man I like! Fully erect, a roll of quarters. And balls are as small as jawbreakers. As Liz told me not half an hour ago...at least I will never go hungry or broke. Ha ha. I am NOT laughing! I concluded as my mouth was on his dick, that sex was not an option. First all, not sure I could even feel it. After all, WPOS was almost nine inches and sometimes that wasn't enough... Secondly, I think the condoms I bought would be too big! I don't want to have to go shopping in the first aid aisle to buy finger cots that aren't even sterile. Why? Why hast thou forsaken me? So I finished him off quickly and went to sleep.

Naturally, as this is a sensitive subject involving highest confidentiality, I have been telling everyone, and getting a lot of useful advice. The most important advice (and which I plan on sticking too) is to ride it out. He is a nice guy, he obviously likes me a lot for some unknown reason, and he may have other ways to make up for his lack of...

Going to see him tomorrow after the wake of a childhood friend who drowned on Wednesay. I hate wakes. Haven't seen this guy in over 10 years, but was very close with his sister back in the day.

More drinks would definitely help the situation, and fortunately, Jlk is home so I will do so.

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