June 06, 2003 - 1:03 a.m.

I went to a last minute birthday party for my friend Liz this evening with two dates: Dan and Ken. Went splendidly, I must say. Both men scoped each other out for a while, but in the end were getting along as old friends, despite the fact Ken lacks several social graces (but not enough to be embarassing) and Dan is unbearably conceited. In addition to Dan, poor Ken also met Liz (obviously), her husband, my best friend and her baby. He handled it remarkably well and did not seem at any point ill-at-ease.

Except for when my dearest (traitor) friend and Daniel decided to tell Ken about the time I gave my first blow job. Hey. I was young. I stopped them before the story got too graphic. Thanks guys. Ken looked a bit uncomfortable. But not nearly as much as me.

Was very fun. Will have to spend more time with Liz. I feel shitty, as she has lived in the area for four months and this was the first time I went to see her new house. But will remedy the situation soon. Going to go see Dumb and Dumberer with her when it comes out.

He kissed me again. Eeww. It is just simply awful to have a tongue randomly shoved in your mouth and moved up and down. Woohoo. Will think of way to change that tomorrow.

I am a little bit disappointed with the whole present situation. Brought her some lovely gifts, but could not find the ultimate gift. Years ago, someone (hopefully as a joke) gave me a reusable rubber douche/enema system they found in the Ames clearance bin for my birthday. It has been in circulation ever since, secretly being wrapped for another and slipped into bag of presents for the birthday girl. It's fucking hysterical. Maybe only to us. We give strange things. Once my best friend stole my alarm clock, wrapped it up, and gave it to me. I still laugh about it. Anyway, I was the last one to receive the rubber combo in September. When I moved I packed it into a box and buried it in the closet, and could not locate it this afternoon. It was a greatly upsetting scene, as everyone was expecting to see it. Oh well. I'll just give it to my best friend for her birthday in August. It will be great. Maybe I'll get her some perianal wash, too. Better write that down so as not to forget. I am evil.

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